There is a four letter word that often trips us up. It gets in the way of things we want to do and the people we want to be.. and no it’s not the one you are thinking of!!
It’s FEAR!!. Fear comes in all shapes and sizes. There are the small fears – the ones you acknowledge and do any way or find assistance to help you overcome, there are those that trigger the flight mechanism one encounter and away you are somewhere else running to escape having to face that fear; and then there are the fears that freeze you, like a deer frozen in the car headlights, you stand there just knowing you are going to die and there is nothing you can do about it your body refuses to acknowledge your mind.
I hated networking meetings – those meetings where you have crowds of people in this big room, where you are supposed to speak actually speak to people!! I used to find the nearest big pot plant and place myself behind it occasionally peeking out and counting the minutes/seconds until I could creep out the nearest exit. Now this is not a good fear to have if part of your business is talking to people!!
This was many years ago – I acknowledged my fear and took steps to do something about. I gained confidence and the more I stretched myself, attended meetings, became familiar with the environment the better I got at turning that fear into anticipation. Now I can actually talk to strangers and wonder of wonders they talk back and I enjoy it. Whilst I may still look for that nearest big pot plant – it is only to admire it.… This was one of my small fears that I could do something about and I did I find something to help me with that fear – I improved my public speaking, looked at how to handle impromptu questions which gave me a base to build my confidence and communicate.
I will share my journey to overcome those other fears the ones that caused me to run and keep running and the one that freezes me in place every time I come up against it, in future blogs.
We all have fears ….each and everyone of us… in all shapes and sizes .. some we can do something about , others we can overcome through others interventions and expectations and others well you know the ones that freeze you…
It does not matter if you listen to such clichés as “feel the fear do it anyway” … it does not matter how you work on them.. what matters is what is in your heart and head. It is your courage and strength, your attitude, what you think that really matters and will help you to over come those fears. You need to identify the fears you have, accept them, work on the ones you can, use resources to aid you and acknowledge the ones that you freeze you.
Here at Trischel we are good at helping with fears… after all we have them too and we have traveled the paths you are traveling… let us assist you with the ones we can do something about .. confidence through public speaking, changing to a positive attitude, handling difficult questions and answering impromptu questions. All skills that may help you with your fears whether they be small ones, the ones that cause you to flee or those that freeze you.
Trish @ Trischel